The landscape of Major League Wrestling was changed forever as this week’s MLW Underground (presented by www.newlawoffice.com) had a War Games classic between The Extreme Horsemen and The Funkin’ Army! Not one, but two rings are set up in Fort Lauderdale’s War Memorial for “The Match Beyond!”
The Extreme Horsemen are welcomed by “You Suck” chants to kick the show off, but Steve Corino asks if they suck so bad, why do they hold all the gold? None of their competitors hold gold. in particular that old codger Terry Funk. He then has some sharp words for Terry’s old rival in Jerry Lawler who was pulled from the match by “The Evil Empire” up north! That makes The Funkin’ Army at three men instead of four for tonight’s bloody war. Unlike Lawler, The Horsemen will never sell out and they’re four men who don’t care about “sports entertainment,” they care about pro wrestling. In a few hours, The War Games cage comes out and out go the careers of Terry Funk, Steve Williams and Sandman.
Funk’s team may be down a man, but the Extreme Horsemen sure aren’t. Simon Diamond says they needed a man that was held back just like them and they knew exactly who to call. THe masked man reveals himself to be Justin Credible! He tells everyone you’re looking at “PJ Walker.”
CW Anderson says The Extreme Horsemen aren’t done. Corino has added something to the equation, but the real surprise is the original Extreme Horseman: Barry Windham!
It won’t take a genius to realize tonight that it’s five on three! The deck is indeed stacked against the Funkin’ Army!
J-Cup USA Tournament Match
Tony Mamaluke vs. Sonjay Dutt
“The Original Playa From The Himalayas” comes out with all kinds of charisma, but Mamaluke isn’t much of a fan. Bell rings and the two roll and wrist lock one another. Sonjay really catches Tony off-guard when he sling shot headscissors out of the ring. Mamaluke shows his own athleticism with a spinning senton on the outside!
Mamaluke has a stretch muffler on Sonjay. He dropkicks Dutt’s knee and then begin kicking it in the corner for a bit of hyperextension. Front chancery body scissors by Tony but Dutt diverts it all with a smash in the corner. Massive neckbreaker in the corner by Dutt. He nails an insane Hindu press for the 1-2-3! Dutt advances in the tournament!
WINNER: Sonjay Dutt
Funk will get one more shot at Corino, and it will be Terry who gets to choose a stipulation for his World Title shot and you best believe the gameplan is to injure one another in War Games!
War Games Match
The Extreme Horsemen vs. The Funkin’ Army
The first competitor to enter the War Games match is CW Anderson. His opponent? Sandman.
The match starts and his signature Kendo stick is in play until he takes a forearm to the face. Anderson flings him into the cage mesh, but Sandman shows his extreme resiliency, but a bit of showboating gets a superkick for his trouble. Anderson obliterates Sandman with his own Kendo, but Sandman catches him in the act to hit a White Russian Leg Sweep!
The two trade blows and Sandman vaults him into the steel cage. Both men are bloody as Sandman delivers a crisp suplex to CW. Crossface by Sandman as blood spills from the forehead of his foe. The countdown occurs and next to enter is the MLW World Heavyweight Champion, Steve Corino. He’s got barbed wire wrapped around his right hand and takes a shot at Sandman with it.
The beatdown begins. As the assault goes on, Joey Styles reveals that the World Title match between Corino and Funk will be a dog collar match! Speak of the devil, the crowd countdowns as Terry Funk makes his way to the rings.
Terry delivers some shots to Corino before The Funker smashes him with the chair. He smashes Steve into the steel cage before hitting a neckbreaker as Sandman strangles CW with his shirt! Terry drags Corino over both ring ropes to plant him with a piledriver!
Out comes Simon Diamond next! The champs take it to Sandman and Diamond finds a moment to wield a chair against Funk. Diamond is admittedly out of his element, but Styles notes how he’s assimilating well. Funk gets double-teamed by Diamond and Corino as the clock counts down for Dr. Death.
The good Doc may be the final entry for the Funkin’ Army, but it’s nobody to dismiss as Williams jabs away at the Horsemen. Corino has Funk by his hair as the two men fight up top until Terry gets crotched. Dr. Death takes it to Simon Diamond now until a cheap shot occurs. Next is PJ Walker with a wooden ladder.
The Horsemen send Sandman upside down into the ladder before PJ sets it up in the corner. He pays for it though as Sandman reverses the Irish whip! Terry takes out several men by Airplaning with the ladder. Funk begins to lay into Walker as the Horsemen take out Dr. Death.
The countdown is on, but instead of WIndam walking out, it’s Sabu who comes in like a house of fire!
Corino is an absolute bloody mess as Sabu sets up the table. Dr. Death shows immense strength by gorilla pressing Corino over and into the second ring! The bounty hunter himself, Barry Windam comes out on behalf of the Horsemen.
It’s five on four right now, but not so fast, Bill Alfonso comes in to sacrifice himself! As he takes a shot, Sabu leaps off with a guillotine leg drop to PJ through the table!
Terry has another hot trick up his sleeve – he’s got a flaming branding iron and fans the flame right into the face of Corino! Terry administers his infamous toe hold and it causes the World Champion to surrender! The Funkin’ Army pull off the impossible!
WINNERS: The Funkin’ Army